Atlanta!!!

Atlatl. Or simply spear-thrower.

It’s a bit like a fing-longer, but for your whole arm, and therefore more useful.

Same principle as the sling: they make your arm longer so the “hand” moves faster when you swing it, allowing you to throw stuff at higher and more lethal speeds, and farther.

We’re still quite lethal even without these tools though, just look at baseball pitchers.

Also our accuracy and reach when throwing stuff.

Especially when combined with our ability to make stuff sharp by banging it against other stuff and breaking it just the right way.

Anything else would be in flagrant violation of the GDPR (and this too, probably, though not as flagrantly).

Pagers. Kids under 21 can only get pagers.

They get within two meters of a smartphone, both kid, parents, and whoever owns the smartphone go straight to jail.

Frankly, with the garbage Microsoft is producing these days, and the rate at which the quality, for lack of a better word, is degenerating, I’m starting to consider if LLM slop might actually be less worse…

Oxidane.

lizard that can spray blood from its eye, but nothing in the animal kingdom past or present has a human’s innate ability for ranged attack

I don’t know, a hawk plummeting from the sky at 190km/h onto something the size of a small rodent is kind of impressive, too, if you count the bird throwing itself as throwing…

Also in very short races (up to 100m) if the human is an olympic athlete, though mostly because momentum is a bitch and it takes time for the horse to accelerate all that mass, and by the time it’s done the race is already over (it also probably helps that the athlete knows what they’re doing while the horse is just along for the ride and wondering where it can get some grass).

in the unable-to-reason-effectively sense

That’s all LLMs by definition.

They’re probabilistic text generators, not AI. They’re fundamentally incapable of reasoning in any way, shape or form.

They just take a text and produce the most probable word to follow it according to their training model, that’s all.

What Musk’s plan (using an LLM to regurgitate as much of its model as it can, expunging all references to Musk being a pedophile and whatnot from the resulting garbage, adding some racism and disinformation for good measure, and training a new model exclusively on that slop) will produce is a significantly more limited and prone to hallucinations model that occasionally spews racism and disinformation.

Most animals know humans are too much trouble to mess with.

Sure, you can kill one human. But next thing you know your whole species has gone extinct, or worse, has been domesticated into pocket yappy dogs that can’t breathe properly.

In places where we’ve been around long enough staying away from humans has practically been bred into every surviving predator’s instincts by now (which is what makes polar bears so terrifying, they’re about the only dangerous predator that doesn’t have this instinct yet, and probably never will, now that murdering whole species has become a bit of a bad look); anything that considered us prey and didn’t learn not to simply doesn’t exist anymore.

Wolves in particular (in the few places where they survive) definitely know not to mess with us, except maybe in the frozen depths of Canada, and so do most bears (again, with possible exceptions in the least populated bits of North America) except polar ones.

Electronic Frontier Foundation

Not everyone hates life like you do

Work isn’t life.

It’s the opposite of life (no, death is just its absence).

hang out with co-workers all the time

Bonding over shared trauma and Stockholm syndrome is not a good basis for a relationship (though there’s probably no relationship other than you pestering them while they try to work).

Unions aren’t community.

They’re a necessary defence mechanism against capitalism.

So they ruin it for everyone else.

Sounds horrible, glad I have no intention of bringing a child into this torturous world.

Well, just from reading that I can assure you your coworkers don’t.

sense of community between you and your coworkers, which is a very real and normal thing

No it fucking ain’t.

Forcing people together doesn’t create community, it creates stress, and resentment, and burnout, and migraines.

“Workplace community.”

Biggest oxymoron I’ve ever seen since military intelligence.

ALSO miss the sense of community with my coworkers which I used to get from lunches together, sharing the train ride home, or just working side by side at our desks

Oh, you’re one of those fucking extroverts.

I can’t begin to imagine the extent to which your poor coworkers must have despised you while you constantly bothered them while they tried to work, or have a quick decompressing lunch, or disconnect after a long day of work during the train ride home, the poor bastards. As if work wasn’t bad enough by itself.

No we don’t. Work is work, not fucking community.

Rocky from Hail Mary is sort of crab-like, and I think they’re making a film adaptation…

Doesn’t really show the friggin’ massive wingspan of the damn things, though…