this is something that has always bothered me… I never found the appeal in that and, of course, was pressured by social circles to join in on clubs and similar. this just feels like the most stupid waste of time, as I can’t find any enjoyment on it, and when I watch others doing it they surely look weird and lost in a way. specially the ones I know personally and can attest to their intellect and rational.
eventually I stopped joining them but it kept intriguing me. after reading about it and having long conversations with friends, my conclusion is that this is some left over form of primitive sexual bonding that predates complex speech and became instinctual, a la some “mating dance” ritual. particularly, some more enlightened male friends see that as a “necessary evil” to have sex while others simply never gave me a clear answer (probably don’t ask themselves much and just abide by the social rules). the only thing I could pull from females has been a dismissing “I just like to dance”.
so much so that I could (anecdotally at least) observe very repeatable patterns such as: single couple that eventually meets in a party then stops going, girl that simultaneously loses interest in their partner and gains interest in clubbing which ends up in “someone new” popping up, etc.
as for myself, I can’t really explain the lack of drive. I know for sure I’d rather communicate using actual language and not be in crowded, dark places moving my body aimlessly, faking enjoyment. needless to say, this stance heavily lowers one’s chance to mate, as the whole paradigm revolves around it (at least outside of the dreadful online dating world). so sometimes it can take years for me to develop a new relationship after one has ended. fun fact is that every single one of my girlfriends loved to dance, some even took classes on artistic styles and whatnot.
this is something that has always bothered me… I never found the appeal in that and, of course, was pressured by social circles to join in on clubs and similar. this just feels like the most stupid waste of time, as I can’t find any enjoyment on it, and when I watch others doing it they surely look weird and lost in a way. specially the ones I know personally and can attest to their intellect and rational.
eventually I stopped joining them but it kept intriguing me. after reading about it and having long conversations with friends, my conclusion is that this is some left over form of primitive sexual bonding that predates complex speech and became instinctual, a la some “mating dance” ritual. particularly, some more enlightened male friends see that as a “necessary evil” to have sex while others simply never gave me a clear answer (probably don’t ask themselves much and just abide by the social rules). the only thing I could pull from females has been a dismissing “I just like to dance”.
so much so that I could (anecdotally at least) observe very repeatable patterns such as: single couple that eventually meets in a party then stops going, girl that simultaneously loses interest in their partner and gains interest in clubbing which ends up in “someone new” popping up, etc.
as for myself, I can’t really explain the lack of drive. I know for sure I’d rather communicate using actual language and not be in crowded, dark places moving my body aimlessly, faking enjoyment. needless to say, this stance heavily lowers one’s chance to mate, as the whole paradigm revolves around it (at least outside of the dreadful online dating world). so sometimes it can take years for me to develop a new relationship after one has ended. fun fact is that every single one of my girlfriends loved to dance, some even took classes on artistic styles and whatnot.
tldr: I agree