That checks out:
Having a new Santa each year, as well as a Santa with an exoskeleton, would address the insane g-forces his body would be under from delivering billions of presents all over the world in a few hours.
I imagine Mrs Claus more like an Enderverse Hive Queen.
All of the Elves and Santa’s are just extensions of the self. This is how she can compile ‘the list’. You think those Santa’s and Elves are just doing dress up for the season, but all year they are extensions of the Santa hive, watching to see who is naughty and who is nice.
Did your parent ever put on a Santa hat? They walk among us.
This is also how ‘Santa’ delivers all of the presents in a single night… They are all ‘(Mrs) Santa’.
It all makes sense now… You leave snacks out so when the Santa-maggots hatch in the darkness of their chimneys, they can crawl out and be fed. Also why lil kids must never wait and watch, lest the kids themselves be eaten.
I’d watch this movie
🙏 i need a shitty horror movie with this concept for christmas
It’s not shitty, and not quite the same but Rare Exports is on my yearly Xmas horror watchlist. The short film is about how Santa Clauses exist in the wild as a feral species and are captured and trained by trained hunters to be monetised and sold for Christmas.
The full film (2010) is about the discovery of the first, true Santa buried in the ice in Norway, and his elves swarm to protect him.
I also want this, but with a budget inexplicably rivaling Avatar.
But with the writing, directing, and editing of a shitty horror movie. Just s-tier VFX carrying the world’s most hopeless movie.
This kinda exists and it’s called Slither.
I also want coca cola to sponsor the film without realising what it is until its too late
You already have Diehard and Gremlins, be satisfied ;)
But this could be Die Hard and Gremlins during xmas!
Sigh :)
Lol that’s probably the best response to my nonsense
Xenomorph Santa laying her elf eggs
I think, my brain broke from reading “fun science fact” followed up by “the North Pole elves”…
Well this is ridiculous.
But I never thought to ask where elves come from. Does Mrs. Claus give birth to them? Or they have elf wives that live there too, like a company town at the North Pole? Where they are kept poor and exploited by Santa, so he can fulfill the greedy capitalist dreams of spoiled first world children? It’s like slavery with extra steps. Yeah I got laid in college.
Apparently Santa was originally an Elf. As in tiny, just like all the other elves. That’s why he uses the chimney, it’s big enough for him.
needs more jpeg
The pixels are a eusocial gestalt. One pixel is like the queen bee and every year gives birth to other pixels.
🎶 All I want for Christmas is pixels
Here’s a bucket of them 🪣
Okay so what do we make of the sledge and reindeer? Are they also the spawn of Santa, in a different category like ants have soldiers and workers?
Symbiotic relationship with reindeer. They get the power of flight and Santa gets transport
I believe some ants grow wings so maybe Santa grows a sleigh with reindeer :)
The santa is a hag ?
