Aside from men being horny in the 1800s, and this being a holdover since that time, is there any actual reason why this hasn’t changed?
If society was dominated by women, would this be more likely to change?
I was sweating my ass off hiking in the hot sun, and the question has been bothering me all day after my top soaked through with sweat.
I personally don’t want a boner at the gym, I really wish men only gyms were a thing
Dude. If have enough remaining brainpower to ogle women at the gym and enough blood flow to spare to give you a boner I can assure you you’re barely working out.
Learn to focus.
That said, being topless (for both men and women) in a gym is gross. Don’t leave sweat everywhere. The question is for running outside…
I’m a grower, I wear boxer briefs, it’s just all around uncomfortable to get aroused in public lol, it’s not a choice personally, if I could have no sexual feelings when outside id be down actually, men also have to wear shirts at my gym, think its a common rule
I hate the no reason boxers. I was told the would stop in high school…
You can learn self-control.
Teach, don’t preach. This things got a mind of it’s own. If you know how to turn off my doppelwanger don’t keep it to yourself.
I’ve gotten rock hard looking at sand. Fucking sand. Don’t tell me we can control it.
If you’re actually working out you don’t have blood flow to spare to have a boner…
And if as you say you can have a boner looking at sand it and don’t control it it seems to me like having topless women around shouldn’t influence that much the odds you get a boner.
My wife thinks that we can erect and/or ejaculate at will. Yeah. That not how it works.
Just like any other emotion arousal is a response to a thought. It’s a wave of experience that’s washing over you. That part you can control but it’s less important here. The important part is the thought triggering the arousal. When you are in a situation where you think you can experience sexual outcomes (even if just fantasy) you’re likely to trigger your arousal response and pop a boner. These thoughts can also be tied to set and setting. You probably trained yourself not to have erections around family or in places with social stigma around it like most public places. So you have to recognize that you’re having a thought of sexualization, then you can reframe the setting as an inappropriate one for sexual arousal.
In the moment you can respond with deep breathing meditation if that helps. Focus on your breathing and think about the thought and (paradoxically) feel the feelings the thought brings. You’re doing two things. 1. You’re changing your learned response by doing something other than sexualizing a random stranger or sand (which ironically, being silica, is technically rock hard). 2. You’re learning how to recognize the thought, emotion and mechanics of it’s development to better manipulate it.
It’s not like it’s quick and easy, it can take a while and some effort, but not being a pest nor feeling guilty about contributing to women’s daily difficulty is imo worth it. Not only does this make you a better more approachable person in public but learning about your own arousal can make you last longer (if that’s an issue) and have better, more intense and rewarding sex/pleasure. Win win imo!